'Saturday Night Live' Recap - J.K. Simmons & D'Angelo

“Whiplash” was, hands down, one of my favorite movie-going experiences of 2014. Although it may not sound like it on paper, the story of a relationship between a driven jazz student and his antagonistic teacher is cinematic redbull, an invigorating and exhausting film built around two powerhouse performances. It’s no surprise that J.K. Simmons has won multiple awards and is likely to take home an Oscar. His work on “Whiplash” is both bombastic and introspective, nearly operatic in its Machiavellian evilness and perfectly, calculatedly believable. But while Simmons is enjoying some time in the spotlight, he is hardly a newcomer to show business having starred in dozens of movies, TV shows and commercials. Besides “Whiplash,” he’s probably best known for “Juno” and “Spiderman.”

That all being said, being a great film actor is mighty different than being a staller Saturday Night Live host. So who knows how his talent will translate to Studio 8H. Weighing on all this is last week’s fairly dismal episode and the fact that the upcoming 40th anniversary special is probably taking the time and effort or many SNL head honchos. But maybe it’ll translate into a tightly focused show.

Like I always do, I’ll be writing the recaps “live,” meaning I’ll watch a sketch and immediately write a short blurb reviewing and recapping it. For each segment, I’ll rate it on a scale of 0-5 stars. At the end of the piece, I’ll share some quick overall thoughts and the best/worst sketch of the night.
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Superbowl Shutdown: * *
Like I said with last week’s deflate-gate cold open, I’m not a football fan so I feel like it’s a bit unfair to have me grade them. I mean, I’ve heard of Richard Sherman but I generally associate that name more with “Mary Poppins” than anger issues (look it up, kids!). So maybe (just maybe), I’m missing something and that this sketch wasn’t a tedious, unfunny exercise in wannabe topical humor. Perhaps if they had stuck with the blizzard material we could have had something memorial, but as it stands, the cold open was flimsy and forgettable bland.

Opening Monologue: * * * *
This monologue is very insider baseball and I really wonder what ¾ of the audience who haven’t seen “Whiplash” are thinking. For those who have, the monologue was a funny, if not predicable, send up of one of the film’s most infamous scenes. Sure, it went on too long and having Fred Armison return (and give a lengthy drum solo) boarded on pointless, but it was all worth it for Simmons’ great jabs at the SNL cast (“This is not your weird little videos” he tells Kyle Mooney) and Leslie Jones’ white-hot hatred towards this weeks host.

Totino’s Super Bowl Activity Pack: * * * *
First of all, it’s borderline disturbing to see J.K. Simmons with a full head of hair. With that out of the way, this was a funny and effective commercial parody that I wish had been pushed further. Bayer was great as was the commentary on men-centric commercials, but a little more pointed sadness on Bayer’s part would have really driven this home.

Miss Trash Pageant: ½
Miss Trash is like a parody of an SNL skit. It’s the kind of premise you’d get from a bunch of stoned teenagers rather than world-class comedy writers. It’s formless, unfunny and stereotyped in an ugly, old-fashioned way. I really would have given this sketch zero stars had it not been for the joke that Miss Delaware wasn’t allowed into ISIS. But, really, ooph.

Cinema Classics: * * ½
I’ve hated almost every version of the Cinema Classics or Cinema Classics-like sketches. This one wasn’t a complete failure (for that, see the iteration featuring an Australian movie consisting of Kate McKinnon using the word “boner” over and over) but really only coasted by on Kate McKinnon’s great performance. She really is a treasure.

Teacher’s Snow Day * * * ½
Teacher’s Snow Day is another slick and really well produced SNL music video. It’s funny, especially the material including Simmons’ pantsless principal, but I missed the political or social undercurrent that ran underneath vids like 28 Reasons or the flat-out ridiculousness of something like Twin Bed. It was fine but ultimately felt more than a little empty.

Weekend Update: * * * *
There’s some mighty good stuff on tonight’s Weekend Update. There’s the fact that Che got to do more long-form set-ups (including a really top-notch one about Black History Month stamps) and there’s Strong’s One-Dimensional Female Character From A Male Driven Comedy who seemed better formed than her first outing on Update. It was also a pleasure to have Jebediah Atkinson back talking about the Grammys (or as he calls it, the Spotify playlist of a 12-year-old girl). There was a bit of spontaneity missing from this iteration (unlike the previous one that featured a few breaks from Killam) but he’s got it down a science by now, a really funny science.

Pushie The Pushpin: * * *
Remember that annoying personified paperclip that always popped up in older versions of Microsoft Word? Well, they made a sketch about him. The writing here felt bland, dated (this would have been really funny in 2000) and very safe, even when they tried to take the sketch in a darker direction, but Moynihan really sold it. His energy was infectious and made me laugh at even mediocre font-themed material.

The Jay-Z Story: * * * * ½
There’s no one like Mike O’Brien on SNL. There’s never been anyone like Mike O’Brien on SNL. While The Jay-Z Story isn’t his funniest or smartest short, it’s so strange and so strangely entertaining that I can’t help falling for it. Why there’s a Jay-Z movie where Jay-Z is played by the whitest human being since Jack McBrayer is anyone’s guess but I’m super glad it happened, especially on such a lackluster show.

Career Day: * * *
In a night of weird sketches, this might be the weirdest. In fact, I have no clue what to even think about a skit revolving around a man who messily eats in front of Japanese businessmen for a living. Seriously, I don’t even think I’m capable of grading this at this point, so I’m just gonna go down the middle.

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Best Sketch: The Jay-Z Story, just for the sheer chutzpah of it.

Worst Sketch: Miss Trash.

Musical Guest: D'Angelo
I’m not an R&B guy and therefore I’m not terribly familiar with D’Angelo. While I wasn’t sold on his falsetto-laden, busily produced first track, his second, the politically charged “The Charade” was really quite powerful.

Overall Thoughts:
J.K. Simmons did his best hosting a very uneven show. Some funny, highly original bits stand out but it felt like a ultimately bland and unfocused show, none of which was Simmons’ fault. We better get a get 40th Anniversary special, ‘cause the last two weeks have been somewhere between OK and dismal.