Top 10 Worst 'SNL' Sketches (of the 2013-2014 season)

Last week, I went through every sketch of the 2013-2014 season and came up with my list of the top ten best sketches. But with the really good comes the really bad, so now it’s time to delve into the worst skits SNL has aired this year.

A few notes before we begin. First of all, like I said in the Best Of list, these things are incredibly subjective. You may have hated Monster Pals, I think it’s the best thing SNL aired all year. You may have liked Boy Dance Party while I found it a tired and unfunny rehashing of past SNL successes that just barely missed this list.

Also, a quick note into how I chose these sketches. It’s harder to rank bad than good because, well, bad sketches are just unfunny. Unfunny is unfunny. It’s also harder to write about unfunny sketches without sounding like a broken record. But in choosing these skits, I tended to favor sketches that weren’t just bad but memorably bad. Looking back, I was amazed how many sketches I simply forgot about and, generally those didn’t make the cut even if they weren’t successful.

Let’s get this over with and onto number 10!

[ new page = Number 10]

10. Disney World Show – Ep 11, Drake
I like Nasim Pedrad. I really do. And if she leaves next year to be on John Mullaney’s sitcom, I’ll miss her and not just for her Kim Kardashian. That being said, while I wasn’t a huge fan of her Shallon, Pedrad’s lowest point this year was a weird foreigner named Rahat who stumbled in an Indiana Jones Show in Disney World. Besides host Drake, who tried his hardest to make this sinker float, nothing really works from the repetitious, annoying Rahat to the overly long set-up.

[ new page = Number 9]

9. Sweetland Ranch – Ep 12, Jonah Hill & Bastille>

You know this was a terrible sketch when even Hulu won’t carry it. Jonah Hill gets kicked by a fake horse. Repeatedly. Ha. Ha. Moving on.

[ new page = Number 8]

8. Elevator– Ep 14, Jim Parsons & Beck

It’s too bad the Jim Parsons episode was such a failure because I think the host is a rather talented guy who is surely capable of hosting a funny show. While some people might have liked the sketch Hulu dubbed Elevator, I found I the show’s low point (and that’s saying something). Maybe it’s just me, but I can’t get behind a sketch built around a guy pooping his pants in an elevator.

[ new page = Number 7]

7. Stanx – Ep 11, Andrew Garfield & Coldplay

OK, so as you might notice reading this list, I’m not a big fan of dumb bodily humor. It’s not that I think it’s sophomoric (OK, I do think it’s sophomoric) but that’s not the problem, sophomoric can be fun and funny. “The Hangover” is incredibly sophomoric and incredibly funny. Hell, even Big Joe, which was as simple and stupid as a sketch can get made me laugh. But Stanx? Well that was just a waste of time and talent. Can the SNL writers not come up with anything better than stinky fart jokes? C’mon, guys!

[ new page = Number 6]

6. Dong’s Around The World – Ep 17, Anna Kendrick & Pharrell Williams

I get where this sketch is coming from. The 39th season was a great one for music videos and the female-centric Twin Bed was the second best thing they produced all year. But if SNL did everything right when it came to Bed, they failed to recaptured any of that magic with Dongs Around The World. Instead of clever, it’s crass, stupid, boring and just doesn’t have that sense of fun that make Twin Bed such a pleasure.

[ new page = Number 5]

5. A Christmas Whistle / A Christmas Carol – Ep 9, John Goodman & Kings Of Leon / Jimmy Fallon & Justin Timberlake

Two of the biggest successes and two of the biggest fails this year happened when SNL tried to tackle Christmas. The first, Christmas Whistle, is only funny if you find the sound of an incredibly annoying, out-of-tune recorder funny. The second, A Christmas Carol, is only funny if you find very old, tired gay stereotypes funny. I don’t on either count. Maybe these premises could have worked with stronger writing, but as it stands they were pretty dull and grating.

[ new page = Number 4]

4. Protective Son – Ep 3, Bruce Willis & Katy Perry

In last year’s worst sketch list I talked about the horrible Justin Bieber episode and how the “Glice” sketch made me want to shove a glice pick in my ear just so I wouldn’t have to hear any more of Eddie’s yelling. Good news, he came back in season 39! This time he’s insulting a bumbling flower shop owner (a fantastic Bruce Willis whose anger I can totally relate to). If you’ve read my top ten list, you’ll know that I like dark sketches, but this wasn’t dark or envelope pushing, it was just loud, dumb and humorless.

[ new page = Number 3]

3. Animal Hospital – Ep 7, Josh Hutcherson & HAIM

To tell you the truth, I had completely forgotten about this sketch. Which is good, ‘cause it’s better forgotten. Let’s just leave it at that.

[ new page = Number 2]

2. Ruth’s Chris – Ep 4, Edward Norton & Janelle Monae

Here’s the set-list: a bunch of virginal waiters and hosts in a steakhouse talk about what they think sex will be like. Could be funny, right? But it’s not. There are no real jokes, there are no real laughs, there is no semblance of smart writing.

[ new page = Number 1]

1. Art Exhibit – Ep 13, Melissa McCarthy & Imagine Dragons

I’ve been watching SNL for a long time and can barely remember a sketch that was greeted with this much silence. Seriously, it felt like they filmed it after the audience left. I can’t tell you why this was the worst of the year – Melissa McCarthy and Nasim Pedrad are both very funny and very capable sketch performers – but this one, about a living Frida Kahlo installation and a impatient custodian was more like a badly-written one act than a comedy skit. This was not just the worst, least funny sketch of the year but it was almost painful to watch these two pros struggle through this dead-end material.